So recently I was talking to an old friend from school who is expecting a little one. As I congratulated her she responded with that she was, “excited, but very nervous” which I totally understood. Being a first time momma is such a crazy thing to go through and you really have no idea what to expect.
She then asked “What would be your biggest advice to a new mom?” and boy did this one hit me. There are so many things that you aren’t told before you have your first little one and you have to remember that not every child is going to be the same, so some advice might not work for you.
So as I sat in bed at 3 am – it was feeding time – thinking about what I felt was the most important information to pass on I just couldn’t come up with one piece of advice. I instead passed on three things that I thought would be most helpful.
- Do not feel bad or ashamed to ask for help because being a momma can be exhausting at times! It’s so worth every sleepless night, but nonetheless it is still draining and we are only human. Everyone needs a little breather here and there!
- Try to get your baby used to sleep when there is noise. Sometimes nap time is the only time you can get anything done, so make sure you’re baby can sleep through that vacuum!
- And the last piece of advice I gave (of course there were a million things I could have said, but this last one I feel is the most important one) was make sure you make time for YOU! Being a momma is one of the most rewarding and exciting things, but if you aren’t taking care of yourself then you won’t be able to enjoy all the excitement!
Definitely had #3 hit me hard this last uear especially. I have three children myself…a 10 u.o. daughter, 5 y.o. daughter and a son who just turned 2 on the 4th of December. So naturally, I run a chaotic household to saybthe very least lol. However, i had a bit of an emotional breakdown of sorts several months back and I couldnt understand why or where it stemmed from. I quickly chalked it up to the fact that i suffer from depression, anxiety, add and ptsd. So i made an immediate appointment to see my psych dr assuming my meds werent working correctly and that he should change something so i could get back to my life as usual. Well rather than immediately change any of my meds…he referred me to a therapist and also good friend of his who he was convinced would be able to help me get to the root of my problem. I already had a therapist and he knew this so of course i was just a tad skeptical. But much to my pleasant surprise…she started asking me questions almost immediately involving my kids and husbamd and thee dynamic of my family and life with them. I answered her as instructed and she right away told me that my entire problem was simply that i NEEDED to set aside time each day to tend to myself…in whatever form that might take. She went on to give examples and said that there was necessarily no real time limit as to how kong or short it could be. She ensured me that I can only be the best version of myself if I was in fact tending to my own needs as well. She also said this…’You cannot pour from an empty cup.’ So when I find myself on the verge of an emotional breakdown ….i remind myself that I need to stop trying to pour from an empty cup. So now when scheduking my days every week I set aside time in the early am hours while my family are all still sound asleep….and i take that to pray, read my daily devotional and occasionally I will write in my journal. This time for me alone does so so much good for my emtire day and I definitely notice when ive skipped this part of my day and i regret it totally! Great advice there , Momma ! I hope your friend takes it to heart and strives to adhere to your on point mommy advice!